Holding myself accountable

Since my last blog post ssooo long ago I’ve got myself a job, an active and physical job which keeps me busy during school hours. I lost my mojo and ate copious amounts of food that left me feeling horrible as my mental health spiraled into a dangerous and scary state. With all of that back on track now I am back to wanting to find me.

As the title of this blog post suggests it’s about accountability.
I AM going to find more time to blog
I AM going to read more
I AM going to focus on my studies
I AM going to learn to be more of an early bird

I got overwhelmed by this blog at the beginning, I don’t have a fancy camera to take professional and amazing looking photos, I have my phone.
I don’t have hours to write a blog and proof read, I squeeze 5 mins in here and there.
Although I’m discovering me I’m still a mum to 4 kids living at home, on my own, studying and working. BUT if I can inspire just one person then the aim of this blog has succeeded. Not only is this blog to inspire others it’s to keep me motivated as well.

I may not be witty or have a way with words or have a flashy camera, I most likely will never have sponsers or be a brand rep to gain followers and credibility but I am me and that is enough, I AM ENOUGH.

Just a mum

I have been a mum for the last 15 years, my entry to motherhood was not an easy one. At the tender age of 15 my childhood was taken prematurely, I won't go into the traumatic events of how I fell pregnant as that is not what this blog is about but it certainly marks the beginning of a long and steep spiral.
For 15 years I have believed my life is purely to be a mum, it is all I have ever known. I have dabbled in other career paths but not having the support of family and having isolated myself from having any friendships we didn't have anything other than expensive day care to fall back on and the career path that I chose made that tricky as I was on call.
I hung my doula hat up at the end of last year, I love pregnancy, I love the miracle of birth but being a doula was not something I was passionate about anymore. Eventually I would love to do my teaching degree and become a primary school teacher.

The end of the year also marked a point in my life where I say back and had a look at my life - I'm fat, broke, exhausted and lonely - oh so lonely. My twins are almost 7 now, this is my time, my time to reclaim my life. I have been "just a mum" for so long, who I am? 

My first step in discovering who I am will be to learn to love my body, this body has birthed 7, it has experienced trauma, love, neglect and abuse. I don't have a time machine to undo all the bad but I can do my best to repair the bad.

My goal is to lose 15kg, tone up that mum tum and gain some strength and stamina. To achieve this I have joined The Healthy.
My goal is also to get my Australian citizenship so I can go to University to do my teaching degree.
I can't wait to post my progress.